10 Things: Excuses (A Very Special 10 Things, with Bonus Things)

You should read that title in the same voice as the ABC After School Special promos, because this one’s personal.  And maybe a little bit ruthless.  See what you think.

You may know that I aspire to be a novelist.  But for someone who would someday like to see her name in print (or at least on a Kindle with a real publisher’s name nearby), there has been precious little in the way of real-life writing going on around here.  I have a lot of excuses.  I’m going to tell them to you whether you want to hear them or not (though, if you don’t want to hear them, then you are free to leave).  I will also demonstrate how bogus these excuses are. B-O-G-U-S.  Chant it with me, all of you other procrastinator-writers and lovely friends.  

Do you have an aspiration or goal languishing in the kitchen junk drawer?  What are your favorite excuses?  Do this little exercise with me and maybe we can exorcise some excuses and get on with it.

Number a page 1-10 and write down the first ten things you think of when I say the word “Excuse.”  Go!!

1.  To offer or request pardon for a potential offense, especially one of manners or decorum.  “Excuse me.” “Please excuse Martha’s nosepicking.” (I’m channeling the dictionary.)

2. To grant sanction or pardon for an absence or other work or school behavior. “An excused absence.”

3. An explanation for a behavior, provided to procure pardon or justfy the behavior.  Usually does NOT adequately substantiate the behavior. “Making excuses.” “What is your excuse?”

STOP!  

This is the sort of “excuse” that’s troubling me.  Rewind.  Start again at one.  (Took me long enough to get here.)  GO!

1.  I’m too busy.  I don’t have enough time. (BOGUS: I have time to sit here and twitter and read, so surely there’s time to write in here.)

2.  I can’t concentrate unless the house is quiet/empty/clean/freshly painted/smaller/bigger/or it’s a different season. (BOGUS: just get over it.  Conditions were never perfect for a baby, and I had three of those.  Conditions will never be perfect for writing or anything else, so I just have to do it.)

3.  I have no good ideas, or I can’t sustain a good idea. (BOGUS: There are at least 10 full writing notebooks around here with ideas waiting to be explored.  I just have to do it.)

4.  I have to finish… knitting a baby gift, sewing a running belt, excavating the laundry room, baking brownies… (BOGUS: Those things come and go, don’t let them stand in the way of writing.  Especially if someone else can bake the brownies.  Thanks, babe.)

5.  I would rather… read this book, blog, twitterfeed.  (BOGUS: Maybe I’d rather do these things in the short term, but in the long run, the writing is what I really want to be doing.  All that reading will also enhance my writing and teach me things, so long as I don’t let the reading take up all of my time.)

6.  I’m committed to helping do… any number of things for my kids, for the school, for the community. (BOGUS: See #4 and Stop overcommitting yourself. “No” is a good word.”)

7. I’m tired.  (This one gets me, especially when coupled with…)

8.  I’d rather hang out with Dan and/or the kids, doing something fun, that doesn’t feel a little bit like scraping out the inside of my brain. (Still kind of BOGUS actually: The time I spend with them is so much more rich when I feel personal satisfaction.  I am also so much more sane when I write regularly, so they like me better when I’m writing too.)

9.  There’s too much crap on the desk.  (BOGUS: Ignore it or go to another table.)

10.  I’m too busy writing random lists of 10 Things. (BOGUS: The 10 Things are a warmup, a springboard for the more sustained projects.)

For me, a lot of these excuses apply to running as well.  I’m full of excuses and avoidance.  

Now it’s your turn.  What are your excuses??