Gymetiquette, an etymological journey (with bonus fries)

In Texas, we have a particular way of speaking. We tend to draaaaaaw out some sounds, while shortn’n others. How much we draw or clip depends on our proximity to pump jacks, combines, and the Louisiana border. Dialectical nuances are created by the winds sweeping across the great South Plains. Some drawls are tuned to be heard over the lowing of cattle or the crashing of waves. Cities are too fast these days, of course, so the urban drawl is about twice the speed of rural cousins.

I mention the peculiar vocal intonation of Texans because that informs the inflection of phraseology sometimes, and can therefore help you understand the etymology of a word I seek to define.

Some (existing) background definitions (a pastiche of my Oxford American Dictionary on the Mac, my trusty red Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary, 11th ed., and the Merriam-Webster online dictionary, where you can hear audio clips of the words in question, minus the Texas drawl):

Gymnasium n 1. a : a large room used for various indoor sports (as basketball or boxing) and usually equipped with gymnastic apparatus b : a building (as on a college campus) containing space and equipment for various indoor sports activities and usually including spectator accommodations, locker and shower rooms, offices, classrooms, and a swimming pool c : a place where people exercise 

Gym n 1 : See Gymnasium

Etiquette n (fr etiquette, lit., ticket —> fr MF etiquet, estiquette note attached to something indicating its contents, fr. MF estiquier to attach, fr. MD steken to stick; akin to OHG sticken to prick) the conduct or procedure required by good breeding or prescribed by authority to be observed in social or official life.

Gym derives from gymnasium. Gym plus etiquette equals gym etiquette. This phrase is not defined by M-W, but Bodybuilding.com has a host of articles to teach gym-goers about exercise etiquette. We can extrapolate from the above definitions the sense that gym etiquette is ethical or socially appropriate conduct, procedure, or decorum in the gym or exercise setting. Related term: sweatiquette.

Now imagine taking that phrase, gym etiquette, and applying a little Texas Panhandle to it, eliding the y, and shifting the stress of the contracted word to the initial e. Some possible spellings of the new word: gymetiquette, gemetiquet, gemetiket, jemetiquet, jemetiquette, j’metiquet, j’metiquette.

My expert witness source recommends the spelling, gymetiquette. I like the vague (false) Frenchness of j’metiquette. This new word is a noun. It’s most frequent application is in the phrase, “Well, that’s not good j’metiquette,” as a statement that identifies a behavior so obviously OUTSIDE the standard of decorum as to be deemed ludicrously offensive, and perhaps hilarious.

For instance, when the egomaniacal bodybuilder who never re-racks the weights correctly is caught fondling his girlfriend’s thong while they admire some nuance of their musculature in the gym mirrors as if no one else is in the room.

While its origin relates to appropriate behavior in the exercise setting, the application of our new word extends beyond exercise to denote any behavior that not only violates contextual standards of decorum, but does so in a manner that is absurd and frequently hilarious (at least to observers).

Examples: 1. When taking the cute boy who works at the bank out for a first date, if you order mountain oysters from the menu, he might suggest that “Calf fries on a first date are NOT good j’metiquette” before deleting your number from his cell phone. 2. If a person sits in the front row of an LSAT wearing nothing over his nether bits but a loose-fitting pair of cut-offs, the proctor might scribble “Gymetiquette fail” on the top of his exam. 3. When settling in for a friendly game of poker, if one of the players insists on licking every card, the other players might mutter, “that’s NOT proper gymetiquette,” before throwing pork rinds at the card-licker. 

Witnessed poor j’metiquette recently? Share your shock and head shakes in the comments. 

Update on Friday, April 29, 2011 at 4:03PM by Eglentyne

Thanks to @bego and @somnicide for their informative anecdotes. xo

Comments

[Eglentyne]

Urban Dictionary definition is pending...